How to Parent a Child With ADHD

For parents looking after a child with ADHD, there can be many different challenges to encounter and navigate. These can differ based on the different personalities of both parent and child, the severity of the child’s symptoms, and the child’s age. Adopting specialised approaches to rulemaking and routines is often the best way to negotiate some of the challenges of ADHD and avoid the pitfalls that can lead to negative experiences for both parent and child. Beyond Clinics are a private ADHD clinic in Manchester, specialising in ADHD assessment in adults and children. Here are our top tips for parenting a child with ADHD.

Behavioural Modification

In past generations, many parents would try to force their child’s conformity with conventional methods of parenting. However, when parenting children with ADHD, this is not the best method. At Beyond Clinics, we try to advocate for behavioural modification, which can help children to understand the consequences of their actions and learn how to control their impulses to act. This requires patience and empathy but can have outstanding results for parents willing to invest the time.

The most important starting point is to decide which behaviours are acceptable and which are not. Actions do have consequences, and this is no different for children with ADHD. By establishing clear rules and enforcing them with clear outcomes for following or disregarding them, children with ADHD can clearly understand this. 

There are numerous different ways to go about establishing and enforcing rules. One of the most popular methods is with a points system, which allows the child to accrue points for good behaviour. These points can then be redeemed in various ways to positively reinforce the beneficial consequences of good behaviour. Repetition and positive reinforcement are the keys to success here. This will require clear and open discussion with the child and their other caregivers – such as teachers or babysitters – to ensure that there is consistency across different scenarios.

While it’s important to define simple, easy to follow rules, it’s equally important to recognise that children with ADHD may find it difficult to adapt to these rules. Accordingly, it will be vitally important to allow them to make mistakes and make sure not to discourage behaviours that are part of the child’s unique personality. 

Create Structure.

Creating a structured routine for children with ADHD is essential. This could involve structure around meals, homework, play and their night time routine. Sticking to this every day can provide essential structure and help children to better monitor their behaviour. Night time routines can be particularly important as a lack of sleep can worsen inattention, hyperactivity and recklessness. Helping them to have a routine for bedtime and reducing sugar, caffeine and screen time can massively improve night time rituals, which will aid ADHD symptoms in the day. Creating structure can also be helped by breaking up their tasks – such as homework and chores – into manageable pieces. This can help children with ADHD to better manage their workload and avoid feeling overwhelmed.

Managing Aggression.

It is common for children with ADHD to have aggressive outbursts. Time-outs are a tried-and-tested method of calming both parents and children. They can help the child to ‘cool-off’ and think about their behaviour. For outbursts in public, removing the child from the situation in a calm and decisive manner is the best method.

Exercise is also a good way to manage aggression and other symptoms of ADHD. This is because physical activity burns excess energy in healthy ways, increasing concentration and reducing impulsivity and the risk of depression and anxiety. Physical activity is also a fantastic alternative to time spent on electronics, which can contribute to frustration and pent-up energy.

Encouraging Positive Strategies.

Encouraging children with ADHD to use positive strategies like out-loud thinking or using a wait time strategy can have great results. Out-loud thinking involves asking children to verbalise their thoughts when they have the urge to act out, which can help them with self-control. It can also help parents to understand their child’s thought process, which can lead to better strategies for managing impulsive behaviours in the future.

Wait time strategies can also help with impulsive behaviours, encouraging children to think before they speak by pausing before talking or replying. This is easy to implement while helping with homework assignments or having conversations about their favourite television shows, books or hobbies.

Managing Parental Behaviour.

While it’s important to develop strategies to manage a child’s behaviour, parents also need to manage their own behaviour. Remaining calm and positive will be vital to creating a conducive environment for children with ADHD to flourish. Further, it’s important that parents take time for themselves so that they can continue to be supportive when they’re with their child. All parents are likely to become overwhelmed or frustrated, but taking breaks for things like exercise, a relaxing bath, or planning activities with friends can help to manage frustration and remain calm.

Find Individualised Treatment.

No matter how well parents manage their child’s ADHD, sometimes treatment is necessary. Beyond Clinics are able to help with ADHD assessment in children, working with parents to devise tailored treatment plans and advice for each unique case. Having an external source of support can help to improve the relationship between parents and children, help to devise unique approaches to parenting, and establish rules to create a safe and happy home.